toyota 4runner blue

The Ken to her Barbie

Via Scott Owens - REALTOR®:

Forewarning: Contains small parts and maximum sarcasm. Not recommended for children under 18, or people who don't informed satire...

Divorce Barbie blog creator Mirela Monte suggested, after numerous elucidation exchanges on her blog, that we collaborate on a "Barbie Blog" in admiration of Barbies upcoming 50th birthday.  My prime response: "there's just something a bit creepy about a 38-year-old man script about Barbies in his blog.  Dialect mayhap I will do a "Ken" blog and link it to yours..."  Well, she called me on it, and here I sit, article about a toy that I will never admit to having used...ever...no definitely...NEVER!

In researching for this blog (yes, I said "researching"), I found out that there are 12 billion another kinds of Barbies, accessories, items, appliances, products, and tackle with Special Editions for every damn facet, job rubric and minute corner of life you can come up with of. Not to mention Barbies for every popular cultural icon, talkie, hobby or even piece of clothing.   However, there are valued few "Ken" dolls (at least not funny ones)... so I took some liberties with my versions:

"Biker" Ken®  - Harley-Davidson® Ken® doll will once again intimidate in style in his fun, edgy and authentic Harley-Davidson® outfits. Rococo details like working silvery zippers, silvery buttons and chains, and Harley-Davidson® Motorcycle logos diacritic their ultra-hip biker ensembles. Ken® doll looks hot in his denim shirt, innocent knit tank top, and black leatherette chaps dead on one's feet over his blue jeans. Silvery stud accents and a cutlery and black Harley-Davidson® guard buckle complete his outfit. He's got that exactly cool biker edge with his coffer "hair" and "beard," and the "born to journey" tattoo on his forearm! Doll is pretence able so he can "ride" the Harley-Davidson® Fat Boy® duplication (sold separately).

(Editorial note: This one is in truth a real doll - and what I wrote was a percentage of their ad-copy.  Who at Barbie HQ found Torture's Angel's so cuddly and adorable? This doll is for smidgin girls?! "Ultra-hip"? "He looks hot"? Trunk hair?! Somehow I can't imagine a Hell's Angel active up to another saying, "Dude...does this shirt assign my chest look buff? "Do these chaps reveal my ass look fat?" I'm assuming Harley-Davidson® had to OK this since their logo® and name are all over it, in which cause someone ought to take the "workable chains" found on the Biker Ken® and go throttle some CEO.)

"Metro" Ken® 

Comes with a man-bag ("Murse") containing husk moisturizers, hand cream, locks gel, and back-wax.  "Limited Edition" rendering has a certificate for a pedicure and spa treatment.

 

Sometimes out of it with:

 

 "Alternative Lifestyle" Ken

® 

Aw, heck: call it what it is. This Ken is gay (as in "tribade", not "excessively happy and bright"). The doll wears a satin vest and interstice grip shirt so his ripped stomach is exposed, a shackle necklace with a rainbow color metal arena on it, a bracelet, rings, and one earring.  Non-mandatory purple mesh shirt, purple vest and blue pants.

 

"Homeboy" Ken® - In truth a "fly" Ken in sweatshirt and baggy jeans. Comes with gold jewelry, hip-hop accessories and plentifulness of attitude. Pull the cord and he says things like "Yo' Homey," "Dang, get outta my mush," and "Bro's Before Ho's." Look for the "Puff, Puff, Antiquated" accessory kit.

"Transgender" Ken®, er, Barbie®, er, Ken® (Who knows?) - Formerly known as G.I. Joe. Comes with three, reckon on 'em, three, of Barbie's dresses, and a chiffon scarf to overlie his Adams apple.  This at doll can be easily converted from Ken to Barbie by unqualifiedly adding or subtracting the multiple jump down someone's throat-on parts.

"Gangsta" Ken® - This recently paroled Ken comes with a 9mm handgun, a switchblade knife, a Chevy with cloudy tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit.  Raiders jacket and Rap CD included.  This scale model has been hard to find since the addition of the stroller and infant doll to the Barbie uncover.

"Pimpin'" Ken® - This doll is dressed in the finest leather his girls cold hard cash can buy, complete with red beret, jewel-studded cane and assorted "bling". A exact "action-figure", push the button on his back and look on his "pimpslap" backhand; even curses and mumbles derogatory terms when drape is pulled. This model is only available after obscure and must be paid for in cash (preferably small-scale, untraceable bills)...unless you are a cop, then we don't differentiate what you are talking about. Optional 1979 Caddy sold personally.

"White Trash" Ken®: He's larger and meaner than them other fussy, citified, think-thur-change one's mind'n-you Kens! This pale, mullet-haired ideal comes dressed in Wrangler jeans two sizes too minuscule, a NASCAR t-shirt and sports a fashionable jailhouse tattoo on his forearm. When you encourage the button on his back, he will spit over 5 feet!  Comes with Barbie's Pipedream Double Wide Trailer.   The "Inimitable Edition" gift set comes with two packs of Marlboro Lights, a six-company of Bud Light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD set.  Achieve his pickup truck separately and get a confederate ensign bumper sticker absolutely unhindered.

"Married Life" Ken® - With Beer-bustin' expanding waist*. Molded to recliner. Clothed in a filthy white muscle shirt and his tighty-whities, his imminent is conveniently shaped to fit the included small TV remote control (not attached so that it can get extinct every once in a while to replicate life).  The doll says, "Where's the ancient?" "Shut up woman!" and "Git me a beer." Coupons included for actual beer and chips. (*Please note that waist cannot be reduced once expanded).

"Smash-Test" Ken® - Comes with car, helmet, lively-looking crash test action and brick wall.  Some RE-connection required.

"Ripped-Off-In-The-Divorce-Confirmation" Ken®: - Pull the string on his back and he unloads a flow of insults and death threats for his ex's new man-toy. Comes with a hatred for all women, and a Malibu tan (except for a anaemic band on the ring finger of his sinistral hand).

"Twelve-Step" Ken®: Pull the dangling on his back and he says, "Hi, I'm Ken and I'm an alcoholic." Comes with a "One Day at a Without surcease" bumper sticker, a 30-day participate b interrupt and a pack of smokes.

"Hacker" Ken® (Formerly "Web Locale Designer" Ken®) - The aim of these dolls is to take the stereotype that "pretty" men are numerophobic, computer-unlettered, and academically challenged.  Comes equipped with Kens very own xterminal and UNIX documentation as well as ORA's "In a Nutshell" series. The doll is robed in a sullied button-up shirt and a pair of frayed-out jeans with Casio all-purpose watches and thick glasses that can set ants on fire. Swipe protectors and HP calculators optional. The doll has the beyond belief ability to stare at the screen without blinking his eyes and to go without eating or drinking for 12 hours no-nonsense. His vocabulary mainly consists of polytechnic terms such as "IP address," "TCP/IP," "essence," "NP-complete," and "Alpha AXP's."

Subsequent Hacker Ken dolls will include several variations to parcel out with the complex aspects of hacking. "Hacker Ken Goes to Quod" will teach computer ethics to youngsters, while "K3N R1TES L1KE BIFF!!!" will be of assistance as an introduction to expository writing.

 

"Mid-Life Critical time" Ken® - Barbie and Ken had a falling out. She got the imagine house, he got the mid-life crisis. Ken's is pierced and tattooed in an essay to relive his 20's and he's shacked up with the Swedish au pair off in the penthouse suite. Comes with your pick of BMW convertible or Hummer H1. This doll likes to "investigate," but will never commit.  Comes with a coupon for a example bottle of Viagra.

...

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my car - toyota 4runner

toyota 4runner blue: this is my carr Sorry of the mess on th carpet...was in a hurry to test it out!! thanks to commander, madballer and google ftw for helping me powering these babies up! www.ledglow.com www.ledunderbody.com

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